Getting that first plus sign on a pregnancy test can be the most exciting AND the scariest thing ever. You’re a first time mom – its normal to be nervous. You’re not alone. Becoming a mom will change every single aspect of your life, let me help you avoid the mistakes I made.
- I wish I knew the signs of postpartum anxiety, and that it would eventually go away.
- I would lay in my bed and worry the ceiling would cave in and land on my baby while they slept (this was my most calm worry). I shared this with one of my mom friends and she quickly advised me to call my doctor. It is normal to be nervous as a first time mom, it is not normal to be obsessive over your fears. It is okay to not be okay.
- I wish I had known that dads can take a lot longer to adjust.
- My husband was fresh off of knee surgery when my first child was born so I understood it taking a while for them to bond, but when it took months with my second it felt like he wasn’t all in. This was not true.
- Dads are the “fun” parent, and when a baby can’t interact it makes it harder for a dad to make that connection. Doing skin to skin really helped my husband bridge that gap with our second.
- I wish I had known that breastfeeding can SUCK.
- The first week (maybe longer, especially as a first time mom) your nipples will dry out and HURT. Most babies latch immediately, and then decide not to latch the next feeding. It takes a lot of time and commitment. It is so worth it.
- Keeping a supply is a whole other blog post. My best advice is to stay consistent. You can do it.
- I wish I had known that I could take supplies from the hospital.
- Literally as I was being wheeled out of my hospital room to go home the nurse stopped me and asked me why I left all the supplies (diapers, wipes, postpartum pads, etc.) and I had no idea I was allowed to take them. She found a trash bag and FILLED it with all the supplies she could. My second child, I asked for extras before leaving. I did not buy a single newborn diaper because the hospital gave me so many.
- I wish I had known that not everything needs to be brand new.
- You will go through baby equipment, clothes, bottles, etc so quickly. If you are running a tight budget, thrift or get hand me downs! Most moms will sell baby items for cheap or give them away in almost perfect condition. I am constantly running out of room in my home and have a designated mom friend (her daughter is a few months behind mine) that I give everything to.
- I wish I had known to prioritize myself.
- The first few weeks after you give birth are going to be crazy. Time isn’t real. Once you start getting into a schedule, do something (it can be small) to start feeling like you again. I would make it a point to get up when my husband went to work (I was on maternity leave) and get myself breakfast. I would always nap immediately after, but it gave me a little something for myself.
- Eventually, you can start building this up. If you have someone you are comfortable leaving the baby with, go on a date with your partner or get a spa treatment. Your health is just as important as your baby’s health.
- I wish I had known that I am a good mom.
- You’re going to feel like a failure sometimes. I am so sorry. You’re not a failure. Feeling like a failure is a sign that you are actually doing really well. You will never be able to give your child everything, it is quite literally impossible. Take a deep breath and enjoy these moments. They don’t last forever.
Are you a first time mom or hoping to be one soon? Feel free to leave a comment or email me. I don’t know everything, but I will do my best to help in any way I can.